Oh I Have Been Sick

Good gracious, it sucks being a diabetic especially when I get sick. Over the weekend I ended up in the emergency room at Swedish Hospital, thank God I have a husband who has medical insurance.  But I ended up there after a night of vomitting, diarrhea, and stomach cramps the likes some folks would have passed out on. I almost did after about fours in the middle of the night, I was spent so I woke up Matt and it was off the hospital. Don’t ask me why I always wait so long before I decide to just take it to the emergency room but finally I did. I had nothing left, I’d pretty much threw up everything I ate and the diarrhea has wiped anything else clear. One of the worst ways to be sick is to be vomitting and have diarrhea at the same time because it’s coming out both ends. That effing sucks. Once I got Matt settled because he was a little frazzled, he couldn’t remember how to get to Swedish (it’s like four blocks up the road from us) it was funny. I’m bent over in excruciating pain and trying to tell him to go straight, turn right. Sometimes he’s very calm and level-headed, sometimes not so much. We get checked in and they take me back. Ask me all my vital signs and I tell them what’s been going on. I get a blood sugar done, it was high never good when I’m sick, they put in an IV because by now I’m totally dehydrated and take blood and other things and start testing to see what I have. They put some nausea and pains meds in that IV, sweet relief!! That stomach pain felt like that thing from Alien was trying to escape my stomach. I hate reminiscing about it. After a about a million folks walked in and out of that little room, poking and prodding me they finally came to conclusion that I had a urinary tract infection. If you’ve ever had any kind of bacterial infection in your GI (gastro-intestinal) tract you know how painful it is, painful enough that you’d almost pass out and I almost did. So it was nice to be in the ER and the doctor knew what I had, many times they just come in and look puzzled. I’ve diagnosed myself so many times, I keep thinking all I need is a prescription pad and I’d be all good. So after they came to a conclusion, pumped with some antibiotics and got me some prescriptions I was on my way home.

Since I’d missed most of my sleep, I was totally sleepy and also they’d given me some Vicodin so after I took it I was totally out. Matt, my sweet darling husband, who I love more than anything, just took care of me. I couldn’t eat but he made me jello and got me cranberry juice, picked up my meds at Walgreens. When I’m really sick like this, not a cold or little virus but really sick where I can’t really eat or take care of myself. It’s vital to have someone to watch me for a day or two. Diabetics with bacterial infections or any bad sickness can easily slip into comas if we don’t monitor our blood sugar and get nutrients. I couldn’t eat but I could sip on cranberry juice and ginger ale mixed with water. I don’t want too much sugar because when I’m sick my blood sugar just goes through the roof on it’s on. I’ve slipped into comas before from being this ill, but he talked to my mom and she told him everything to do. So every few hours he came in and woke me up to take meds, test blood sugar, get my insulin. I was groggy for a full day on that Vicodin, personally I hate Vicodin because it makes you feel so loopy but it did stop that pain in my tummy region and at that moment that’s all that mattered. Matt took Monday off to take care of me, it’s just nice to have someone who cares enough to take a day off. I don’t know how many husbands would do that for their wives especially when they’re sick. Some men get all weird and just want to leave. I’m glad that Matt can man-up and handle being a nursemaid for me for a little bit and it’s not killing his ego. As a type 1 diabetic it’s always been a fear of mine that someone I marry wouldn’t be able to handle my illness and the complications it brings and just one day up and skedaddle out of Dodge. I’ve seen it happen to many a woman but he took it all in stride and with my mom’s phone counseling he was able to take really good care of me. Now I’m feeling better and about to get back to work. I thank God I have a job that is flexible and I could take the time I needed to get better without any drama on the job’s part. So for you who wanted a mental image of what I felt like over the weekend, here it is.

 I didn’t want to gross you out too much so I did the Lego version but you get the picture. It was not pretty and neither was I. Thanks for everyone for the well wishes while I was sick, I appreciate you guys care and concern.

 

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My New Blog

No, I’m not ridding myself of Married Girl in a Weird World but I accidentally made a blog when I first got to WordPress that I thought I wouldn’t be able to use. Well, lo and behold I’ve found a use for it. It’s called Sometimes I Write cause sometimes I do write mostly fiction. So if you want to see what I write, head on over there. I enjoy writing fiction, at one point in my life it kept me from going completely insane. I like to share it and get some feedback good and bad, but don’t be too harsh I do have feelings. I want people to see what I write, I don’t think I’ll ever have it published for profit but it’s fun to write and take others to another world. It can get racy with some of the things I write but I swear I won’t send you into my writing blind. This may also force me to finish some of those stories that are in limbo.

Hey, What’s Up With the Blue-Collar Dude?

As a caveat before I start this post, I want to say I want all women to have the best of the best in a mate. But what is best for me may not be best for everyone else, so when I write about things I write to let people know you have to do what is right for your life. That’s what matters. Now with that being said, I am a woman that’s NOT into the blue-collar dude. I like my men with degrees from a college that is accredited and the kind that gives out BA’s or BS’s not AA’s. Okay call me a snob but I’m sorry, I have BA, a certification from the University of Washington as a paralegal and an MBA. I would expect any man that I got involved with while I was single to have at least the minimum, be educated and have graduated from a 4 year college. That’s just how I roll.

But now I’m going to talk to women who may be a little more open than myself. The blue-collar man has been looked down upon by some and I’m not sure why. He may not be able to talk about wine with the wine snobs but you may be a woman that doesn’t like wine, I certainly am one although I do enjoy some good champagne. A professional blue-collar guy may not be a bad deal for many woman. Many blue-collar men I know have well-paying jobs, some have businesses and they are hard working men. No he may not be as cultured as other men, you may not have a jet-set life style but let me be truthful most women married to men with degrees have none of that either. When I say blue-collar I mean professional, not the guy changing tires at the local gas station. If your man is a mechanic for Mercedes, guess what you’ll probably own a Mercedes. When my best friend’s Mercedes broke down one day the guy who came out to fix it was in a Mercedes that he owned, he told her ‘we work for the company so we own the our product so we can show people we stand behind it’. That ain’t bad for a mechanic and he probably made a very good living. My little brother drives the bus for King County, he makes a good living (real good), when he and I both worked for King County (I worked in the Legal Dept. of the Sheriff’s Office) he made more money than I did, a lot more and I have the two degrees. But he’s part of a union. You can marry a plumber, hey it’s not a glamorous job but do you know how much plumbers make an hour, hire one and find out. That’s why I say they may not be a bad option. He may own a small business, that could be passed down to your children.

I’m not down on blue-collar dudes, Matt was a blue-collar dude before he graduated college and little after. He did concrete work from the age of 16 till a little after college and he also knows carpentry. Now my husband is an engineer but it sure is nice to know that when we own a home, he can pour a patio, make me those concrete counter-tops I’ve always wanted or build me an addition on our home. He actually helped his parents build their log cabin home. I don’t know what you’re looking for but you need to know. Not every woman wants wining and dining and jaunts to Europe every year. Some women are content to stay close to home and take a trip out to a lake cabin or go camping. Now I’m not trying to put anyone in a box I’m not saying the average plumber dude is not a renaissance man, he may well be and I’m not implying that all guys with college degrees are stuck-up. What I am saying is that there are many men out there that are good men, not all of them have been to Harvard. I don’t think it’s lowering your standards if you marry a man with a good paying job/business that can take care you, provide you with a home, nice car, you probably won’t have to work or just work for his company, nice vacations, and security minus a degree along with loving you and your family to death. We all could do so bad.

Lawd Have Mercy, He Hot!-John Stamos

Sometimes I just like to go back into the way-back machine and celebrate classic hotness. What could be more classic and hot than John Stamos, yes ladies Uncle Jesse from Full House. I only used to watch that corny show to look at his hotness and beautiful hair, the man was stud among toads. The wonderful thing is even after all these years, his hotness has yet to wane. I don’t think many know this because I always say I have a penchant for blondes and I do, but I must say I like Greek men, the Greek men I’ve seen are really some good-looking men. The golden dark skin, the beautiful sexy chocolate eyes and don’t catch them with light eyes like John’s, sweet baby Jesus! The beautiful dark hair, that smoldering kind of sexiness when I  was young we’d go to the Greek Festival at the Greek Orthodox Church (love the food) and when I became a teenager I started to notice some the young men and was a little smitten. So hell yea, I love me some John Stamos as soon as I saw him on the Oikos Greek Yogurt commercial, I started eating that yogurt. Are you crazy John Stamos said eat it, of course I’m going to do it. I follow him on Twitter and he doesn’t tweet much maybe once a day but really I kind of lie in wait for those just so I can ogle that beautiful photo of him that comes up with the tweet. Really he is a beautiful man and not many men are beautiful and I don’t mean pretty, I mean like I could just stare at you all day and never get weary of it BEAUTIFUL. He looks like he’s going to be an amazingly sexy older gentlemen. So here he is in all his glory and yes I’m feeling some kind of way looking at these photos, John Stamos. Oww whee man!

Not Everyone is Going to Love You Nor Should They Have To

Over the weekend I read this article and it’s been passed around some between some of the blogs that are BWE/BWIR, the article from NPR was called The Changing Face of Seeing Race. Most of us understand that yes race and people’s feelings about race are changing, not as fast as I’m sure people would like but it is changing. This article in particular, was talking about interracial dating and how it’s on the rise, which is not really a surprise since people are working, going to school, living in communities, and in a smaller context socializing with each other more so eventually yes, someone is going to notice someone and well sparks may fly. But the article also contends that when picking partners for an interracial relationship, that whites pick blacks last.

Now I have some issues with the article in the first place, why is it written just from a white perspective. As if no one else gets to choose in the interracial arena just white people since they’ve been deemed best of the best. I would have liked to know how many black people pick white people, how many Hispanic people pick white and if we’re really talking about interracial dating/mating how many people don’t pick white people at all. But that part is sorely absent. My thoughts on the article is it’s badly written, kind of thrown together and if NPR is going to give me something I’d expect them to go deeper, come on NPR someone rushed this the internet. The article is short and has two quotes in it, that I found completely odd. One is from a person in a interracial relationship with his black wife in Atlanta and the other is from a Professor at Howard stating his reasoning why black people are picked last in the interracial dating pool. His explanation or at least the part they included is like one line long and I thought, well isn’t there another perspective but I guess not and it just sounded like his opinion, it wasn’t as if he’d done some study or something he just stated his opinion and it was treated as the gospel truth. So really the article was poorly written and even more poorly researched. Now I’m not saying I’m doubting that maybe whites pick blacks last, that may be true but it may also be true that blacks may not choose whites because of our history together. In my personal dealings I find white men more open to interracial dating than I find black women or at least black women that are willing to say it openly. Now that I’ve dissected why I think this article sucks rocks. I’ll go on to my next thoughts about black women’s response to it.

Sometimes I don’t understand people, particularly black women, particularly black women who are exercising their options with dating and mating. I hate to tell people this but everyone is not going to like/love you, everyone doesn’t have to like/love you, every man doesn’t have to think of you are desirable or dateable. I have a preference, I’ve always preferred white men but no other men should be upset because I won’t pick them, they should go where they need to go to find women that prefer them. I realize and understand that most people are still in and prefer a mono-racial relationship, that’s just how it is. Although interracial is rising, it may be years before it becomes common. I’m pretty sure it won’t be in my lifetime. But the fact that all white men weren’t jumping at me for a date didn’t change my preference. It didn’t discourage me, because there were some white men who seemed interested in me. Now overall I don’t think white men are all consumed by the interracial dating thing with black women as black women are. Many of whom have never had anyone compliment them on their looks except to degrade them and have not been appreciated. So yes some are discouraged by this news but why, all you ever need is one man to love you and I’m sure of all the people in the world you can find this man whether some statistics say you’re being picked last or not. Personally I don’t pay these kinds of articles much attention because when I look at real life, it’s always different and varied. No one can understand or study, as much as they try, why people fall in love with the people they do love and how it operates is beyond all studies, we get close but we never get it. And really maybe we aren’t supposed to get it, maybe we should just sometimes leave well enough alone. Man finds a woman, she’s beautiful, everything he ever wanted, he falls in love, they get married and move on with their lives. It’s not that complicated, let’s please stop making it so complicated.

Dating After Divorce-the Lessons

I know some folks wonder how I got back out there and started dating after my divorce. I know of some women who are divorcees who still are kind of leery of dating again but I must say how I got out there is I put one foot in front of the other. I’m a bit of risk-taker but never stupid risk just calculated ones. And after my divorce I decided I didn’t want my ex-marriage to dictate how I felt about taking another chance with dating and falling in love. I didn’t want my ex-marriage or my ex-husband to hold that kind of power over me so I decided I was going to do what I needed to be done with my ex-marriage and to heal and learn from my experience so I could open myself to possible love again. I believe in love and I think it’s a wonderful thing especially in an intimate relationship. We are designed to spend our lives in the love and companionship with one another so although my first marriage had gone badly, I learned a lot about myself, what I wanted and love.

I’m going to list some of the things that think divorcees need to contemplate, before and when they start dating again. With this list I will also include some posts I’ve done on the subject that may be helpful. I hope you find it useful, if not pass it on to someone it may help. My advice is never for everyone but it’s for someone.

  • Take stock-most people when they leave a relationship especially after a divorce are totally down on their ex-spouse without ever looking at their part in the break up of the marriage. We all have a part in a relationship working well and working badly so you just can’t pretend your hands are clean. Even if you were in an abusive relationship, you have to take ownership that you let that go on and didn’t stop it and why you did that. It’s time for some introspection to ask the hard questions. Why you picked that person? What patterns you may have from previous relationships?  In my post Sometimes…It’s You it talks about doing some introspection to see your part in your issues.
  • Seek therapy if Needed-I also want to let any woman who has some issues from her previous marriage that she’s having a hard time resolving to get some therapy. Therapy does not mean you’re crazy, it means you may be having problems working through some issues and need someone to give you some tools, help and guidance. I don’t care who you get the therapy from but there is nothing to be ashamed of in seeking therapy. Anger and hurt about the loss of your marriage is normal but don’t let those things fester too long and turn into bitterness which is not good for you. In my blog post Sometimes…People Need Therapy and Sometimes…You Need to Just Move On, I speak of the benefits of therapy and learning to move on from a relationship. It’s not always easy to do but it can be done, I’m proof of that. Also you need to resolve these things because the next man to come into your life does not deserve to pay for what some other person did.
  • Get Out There and Date-Once you decide you may be ready to get back up on that horse again and that may take some time, but take as long as you need. But once you’ve moved beyond some things and issues it’s time to get back out there and date. Now some of this advice is for black women who are looking to date inter-racially but I think any woman could use it. Having been off the market so long when I started to date again, I was totally out of my element. Dating had changed, a lot, since I’d been off the market. I had to learn the new way to date, now the rules were still the same but the dating styles and how you met people was a little different. I recommend doing both online and in real-life meetings. It won’t hurt and it will put you out there in every possible fashion. Online dating is a different world but it’s not impossible to handle. My blog post called Online Dating-It’s a Jungle in There gives a little advice on how to get the best out of online dating.
  • Don’t Fear Rejection-But once you start dating, something else will occur that may throw you for a loop, rejection. Listen rejection is part of life, sometimes we’re rejected and sometimes we’re the rejector. But you can’t just reject people and not expect to be rejected. Sometimes…Rejection is a Good Thing is a blog I wrote to address a lot of what I heard on the web about people not doing online dating because they felt so rejected and in both the above posts I talk about rejection in real life and in online dating world.  It’s not a bad thing and not really reflection of you, but we all have something we want and we can’t be everything to everybody. I rejected a lot of people and a lot of people rejected me, I didn’t die from it. But it’s part of dating.
  • Know What You’re Looking For-But you know what can make things easier for you when you online date or date period is knowing what you want. In my blog post Sometimes…Well All the Time, You Have to Know What You Want I talk about women knowing what they want so they can seek it when they date. I suggest no one go into dating without knowing what they want out of the relationship and what they need from the other person. Now this is not something you bring up immediately but there’s a way to ask questions and get the answers you need so neither he nor you waste your precious time. Usually divorced women are a little older and unlike young women, I feel we don’t have much time to waste diddling with folks who aren’t meeting our needs. Please read Sometimes…You Need to Listen to What is Said and Not Said, it’s a good blog on active listening when it comes to dating. I think many women miss a lot of ‘red flags’ regarding men by not listening to what they say or don’t say.
  • I have two great articles on how sometimes being suspicious can be a good thing but I also believe in taking a bit of calculated risk taking to get what you want. Those two things can exist together. What’s So Wrong With Risk Aversion may speak to some women who are terrified with taking the risk with their feelings and hearts in another love affair but I say if you avoid all risk, you avoid the chance of finding love too. I didn’t want to not be loved or have the chance to be loved by a wonderful man again. But you don’t need to go in with blinders out, suspicion can serve you well until that wonderful man proves himself or that not so wonderful one fucks up, You Better Be Suspicious discusses how suspicious serves human beings well especially women dating. We want to put ourselves out there again for a chance at love but there’s no need to be stupid about it.
I don’t regularly discuss sex and what people need to do about it, that’s up to you and your partner. I will say get tested and be open and communicate regarding sex. That is always the best way to get your needs met whether you are celibate or decide to be sexually active in a monogamous long term relationship. If you meet someone who has your heart all a-twitter and decide to make the big jump back into marriage, one of my favorite and most read blogs is Marriage is Good for Practical Reasons Too. I hope some of these life lessons I’ve learned will help you as you try to get back out and there and seek love again after a divorce. My story is not an anomaly divorced people find love again everyday and maintain happy marriages with a new spouse.

Sometimes…I Just Don’t Give a F*ck!

It’s true sometimes I just don’t care, about people, their issues, their drama or whatever. Sometimes I could give a good goddamned about what people are doing or are up to. It’s my natural nature to be kind of nonchalant, I only get riled by things I find important and to tell the truth I find very little important. And I’ve been hearing things this week and I’m thinking why are people concerned about that, just why. I heard something about Beyonce’s pregnancy being fake and…who gives a hell. Why are we so obsessed with celebrities. I wasn’t liking her more cause she was pregnant and I’m not going to like her less cause she’s faking. She lives in Hollyweird, them folks do all kinds of stuff ordinary people wouldn’t ever think of really cause we don’t have fame attached to us we are trying to keep. I don’t know I’m just thinking people are maybe ‘feeling’ themselves a little, thinking they are more important than they are. No one is trying to get you, no one cares what you do. I say this because I don’t care what other people do, so my thought is always, why the hell would somebody care what I do. No one is after you or plotting against you, really because other people just don’t give a fuck about you. Most people have their own lives, issues, problems, and concerns to think about. Why would they ever be thinking about what you or I do is beyond me. Personally I think people only think others will do things to them that they themselves would do to people, that’s why they’re so suspicious of everyone. But this week, yes I’m not caring about how folks feel, so what, get over yourself. Maybe next week I’ll but then again I may not be giving a fuck then either.

Who Are You Trying to Convince? Me or You?

I read a few websites and blogs online and you’d be surprised, how many I don’t read. I don’t particularly like negativity or craziness in my life so there’s some stuff I refuse to expose myself to. I’m actually really discriminating about the web because of the plethora of foolishness on here I’m careful. But I follow Madame Noire on Facebook, I don’t regularly read this online magazine but sometimes they may have something interesting to say so I peruse it. I read an interesting article in it the other day the actual article was ‘A Pregnant Nia Long Does Double Cover for Ebony in the Nude’  and she looks gorgeous on the cover of Ebony all carmely and naked with that big pregnant belly. Now at the moment she isn’t married to anyone and she didn’t mention who the father of her child is may be the man who’s the father of her first child, meh.

But really that is just an aside, this is about a comment she made in the article and some other black women are making on different sites. As you know I don’t regularly just go blindly on the web but sometimes I read an article or comment that makes me go ‘hmmm’. One that Nia made did just that, she was speaking about having a baby after 40 and how black women need to do what’s natural to them. You don’t have to go by society’s rules on when you need to marry and yadda, yadda, yadda, whatever, whatever. The same edicts you keep hearing from black women about waiting for perfection before they ever think of marrying someone or trying to convince them and everybody else that marriage is no big deal. The comments were about black women having children in their 40s which probably is when a lot of successful college-educated black women may be having kids. Now I never particularly wanted children but I knew if I had decided to have them it would have to be early on. At this point, I have no interest in trying to have a child at 40 years old. I mean, let’s be serious I’m old, I’m set in my ways, I’m not that patient, and I don’t have a ton of energy. And I am not downing women for having children in their 40s but this notion of promoting this line of thinking is a little irresponsible. The are risks in having a baby after 40 and anyone who tells you different is just plain lying. When I asked my doctor about having a baby at the age of 37, she was very plain spoken with me about my risks. Although it’s not impossible it’s very risky and did I want to take those risk with my life and health as well as any potential child I would have. So I decided not to do that while many women do, it’s not advised for health reasons to do so.

Now with the state of black marriage, which is not that positive, black women are being sold a new bill of goods. ‘Oh, do what is natural for your body’ listen what’s natural for your body is have a baby while you’re in optimum health which is in your 20s not in your 40s. I just that if people need to be honest, if you really want a family and children you need to make those plans early in life and go forth. You cannot wait till you’re established in your career and life and in your 40s and decide you want to be married then you have to rush the wedding and the baby. It’s best that folks getting married take a little time to get know each other as husband and wife before you throw in some kids, children change things from what I see with people who have them and they change a lot. I know two couples that were married in their mid-20s and took time to establish their marriage then introduced children into their families, each waited over 5 years before having their first child. And you know what, they each have some happy and stable families. I also know of women who had kids in their 40s and their single with the baby daddy thing going on and it’s a bit of a hot mess. The woman is older, less energetic, less patient and the child(ren) are getting underfoot or being passed off to family members so they ‘take time for themselves.’ The one thing I know about children and folks who have them is that, there is no time for yourself, at least not an abundance of it. I’m sorry as much as I love kids, I don’t want to be bothered with other people’s children. I get to have that luxury by not having my own. I know women who have married later in life, especially amongst black women and their biological clocks are going off like crazy so now they get married and rush into making the baby thing happen without getting a chance to be a couple and enjoy all the benefits of that, the quiet, the freedom, the extra money, and all the sex you can handle. Now I’m not saying it’s terrible being parents or that parents don’t enjoy some of these things too but when it’s just you and your boo, you enjoy them in abundance. You can also take some time to get prepared to be parents. I’m not liking the trend of folks trying to convince black women that we’re X-Men Mutants and can have babies forever with no consequences or repercussions. It’s a disservice to black women and their health. I’m also not advocating that you run out to have a baby with a knucklehead you aren’t married to. I’m saying that black women who are thinking of having families should really think about what they are doing to make those results come about, you can make a plan in your life and have it come to fruition just many black women do with education they should do the same thing with relationships and marriage. No one seems to be better planners than us.

I also wish people would stop trying to convince me and themselves that having a baby in your 40s and 50s is some grand idea.  It may certainly work but why make things harder. Nia Long can have a baby at 40, she’s probably got a nanny most older black women probably don’t. My mom told me once that when she had me and my brother in her late 20s and reared us she was ‘just tired’ in a sense when it came to discipline and us, so many things my two older brothers didn’t get away with we did. Now she was tired in her 30s, really what are we thinking about raising teenagers in our 50s and 60s. I’m sorry but at that point, my thoughts would be on my retirement and settling down to a quiet and peaceful life and if I had kids, sitting up and spoiling my grandkids not trying to rush my own kids around to soccer and other extracurricular activities. You can miss me with that.

You Know I Do Have Some More Photos-Part II

I am loving sharing these photos with everyone. This was just such a joyous and blessed day for me and Matt. I just can’t help but share the love. I got these recently and I haven’t been my best friend’s studio yet but she sneaks me pics everyday on Facebook and I just eat them up. So here are some more.

Of course this is me, I am a big smiler. One thing people always say about me is that I have a great smile and giant cheeks.

This is after we were presented as man and wife. My friend loves to take photos like these, catching you in ‘moments’ she said she liked this one because of the way Matt is looking at his new bride. I like it too.

Our wedding kiss, you see how far I gotta stand up on my tippy toes, he’s tall.

We prayed the Lord’s Prayer before we were announced husband and wife. I don’t know about anyone else but I’m a Christian and I was not going into my marriage without God’s covering. But look at Matt’s pants, I didn’t notice how saggy they were and my friend told me. I died laughing, my poor baby he don’t have much booty to keep them pants up. LOL!!!

This is us walking up the aisle as husband and wife after the ceremony. We played Barry White’s “My Everything’ as we walked down and out of the chapel and it was cool.

This is me and Matt’s older brother Chris before the ceremony, my friend caught us and we took a photo. He’s a handsome fella but sorry ladies he’s taken, has been for 19 years.

These are my nieces Oly and Jada, Jada is the tall one she’s 14 and I’m threatening to cut throats with dudes looking at her. She’s too cute and too smart, she also likes white boys. Takes after the Aunt, hehehe.

Well that’s it, till next time.

Angela Bassett- Swirl Movie Queen but Would You Ever Know?

I love Angela Bassett, I really do. I think she is totally underrated in Hollywood and although I love Halle Berry really as a serious actress she runs circles around her and many other black and white actresses. Also the women is in her 50s and has a flawless face and body to kill for, she’s a person that makes me run to the gym. She doesn’t get much credit, doesn’t seem to seek much but as I watched a television movie, a few nights ago, she made a few years ago called ‘Ruby’s Bucket of Blood’ I realized I’ve seen this woman in three other movies where she is part a swirl love interest. I’m also thinking, why have I never noticed this.

Angela is married to another actor Courtney B. Vance and they’ve been married almost 15 years and although Courtney is an accomplished actor in his own right, Angela is the star in that family. They are an adorable couple and seem to love each other very much. But I just noticed this phenomena with Angela being the love interest of white men in movies just recently. I don’t know how she feels about swirling in real life but from what I can see onscreen it’s probably not a big deal to her. Although she’s known for her role in ‘What’s Love Got to Do With It’ the biopic about Tina Turner and she was brillant and in Terry McMillan’s adaptation of her book ‘How Stella Got Her Groove Back’ and ‘Waiting to Exhale’ she has done four roles in not so known movies where she’s the love interest in a swirl. As I mentioned ‘Ruby’s Bucket of Blood’ set in 1960s Lousiana where she has a bit of lurid affair with Patrick Anderson’s character, a rocking white boy at her juke joint. She was also in ‘Supernova’ a sci-fi thriller where she and James Spader’s character got it on in a floating chamber. She also starred in ‘Strange Days’ as the helpful Mace to Ralph Fiennes’ tragic character now they didn’t get together till the end but I say that counts. She also starred as the love interest to Robert DeNiro (big surprise) in ‘The Score’ although I’ve never seen that movie. Now she’s been in a ton of movies mostly when she had a love story it was between her and a black man but I was just shocked that nothing has ever been said about her and some of the swirl roles. Halle Berry got dragged through the proverbial dirt for playing in a sex scene with Billy Bob Thornton in ‘Monster’s Ball’. I’m not encouraging anyone to go after Angela, she is a class act as is Halle. But when I think of black actresses who may be swirling in film roles before this she would not have come to mind. But I’m glad I noticed and maybe I turned some folks on to some good movies with a great actress.